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At Szeged, I asked a female Drupal contributor in Hungarian (I'm glad she did not understand) what was up with the coffee maker, because I readily presumed she was staff.
I saw one of the female geek role models at Austin with her baby. I got confused for a second, because apparently I think the übergeek and mother roles can't overlap.
On IRC, I almost said "Wow, that's impressive from a girl.".
I do not know how I can avoid these thoughts, but I am aware of them, I am bothered by them, and I try not to act on them. I also try to point out to fellow Drupalers when they act on their thoughts that these are not appropriate. I'm not sure what else I can do.
If you have good ideas on overcoming prejudice, please share!
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Thank you for being so open about this, it takes courage to talk about our imperfections. I recognize the situations you describe from my own experience. It's no secret that prejudices exist, but at the same time, being aware of them is a very important first step.
I don't know the magic formula to overcome prejudices, but communication is very important, as always. Here's an open invitation: When prejudice makes me say something stupid, I hope all people around me will assume I have good intentions, and help me improve.
marcvangend
Those prejudice are the results of one of the most basic thing our brain does, it creates schemas. They're quite useful shortcut that allows us to have a basic understanding of a situation without having to analyze it all over again, but they can be misleading.
One way that seems to have a lot of success in getting over them is through meditation. There's so many schools of meditations that it'd be tricky to recommand one, but through meditation, the intellect becomes just one of many tools we have at our disposition to go through life and like every tool, it has it's own limitations. Not all programming language are suited for all tasks. ;-)
Love
I also think meditation can help with the OP as well as with most other aspects of our life. The mind has a lot of influence in us and meditation helps controlling it every time a bit more, with practice.
So eventually, all changes, because we regain control of ourselves. We then are able to consciously and effectively put our mind (and whole being) in a 'good' direction and that only brings good things back. Hope it doesn't sound too cliché :) but yes, meditation FTW
Above all, remember, we are all learning, all is well.
Peace
Everyone has thoughts they don't want. I just sort of correct myself mentally and eventually I don't have those thoughts anymore. So, basically, I do what you are already doing. :) I don't think there's any trick to it. I just have to think about my mistakes a little and my mind apapts. When I don't spend a little time and think about my mistakes, then I do them again. Cheers, Jeff